Dreams and M&Ms

Hello all - I'm sticking with my consistently inconsistent blogging habits to post tidbits of my latest thoughts and ponderings. Please enjoy:

The Big M's

As a single lady, now in my mid-twenties, I've discovered the development of a possible fork in the road that might also be present in the lives of other young Christian women my age: Missions & Marriage.

I am not by any means expecting a freshly glittered and weighted left hand, however, I realize now it's not quite as far off as I once thought. Nor is the opportunity for a life of mission; a life devoted to being laid down and poured out for the sake of the gospel.

At first glance, one may easily assume the second M, that is Missions, is more glorious, more approved and praised by God. But upon looking deeper into the heart of each M they essentially are one in the same, though the practicals may be extremely different.

Bear with me as I process this a bit out loud...

Are we not to live our lives doing all we can for the Glory of God? 

(Col. 3:23) yes...we are.

So then, what is the difference in serving God by loving and serving your husband/family? 

Or serving God by serving and loving the lost?

Serving/loving your husband is less, practically, evangelical. I doubt going around shouting Romans 6:23 to your husband each day while drawing the bridge diagram on every free space in the house encourages love and affection, ha! 

However, do I not need to hear the gospel each day? To be reminded that I am sinner in need of much grace and forgiveness from the Father each day?

And my husband, equally a sinner, does he not then need to hear it too? 

Yes. 

So perhaps the evangelism occurring in the newlywed home is a bit more subtle, a bit more gentle, and a bit more spoken unto the self so as to serve and love one another more faithfully and genuinely. For how else is one to seek to love unconditionally but to be loved unconditionally, accepting His grace and forgiveness with new mercies each day, each moment.

This aspect of Gospel living, in my mind, seems slower, deeper, and more steady.

The other M, Missions, obviously, at first thought seems adventurous,exciting, pioneer-like. Being on the front lines of anything, it seems, means the highs are so high and the lows are so low; the risks are much more risky but the rewards so much more rewarding. It seems there might be more to lose as a single woman serving in missions, in any capacity - Overseas, Stateside, Part-time, Full-time, volunteer, what have you. Your 'husband' is the Lord and your children? Well, you are a spiritual mother. Your children are not your own biologically per-say. Your time is spent for the spiritual nurturing of those around you and, yes, the self-gospel preaching still happens, but the outward gospel preaching seems like it would be more frequent as it would be your 'job'. But do you really have more to lose? Perhaps I'm thinking it seems like there is more to sacrifice? But is it really more of a sacrifice? I know plenty of mothers faithfully serving God by serving their husbands who sacrifice a TON!

Personally...I know nothing of being married, nor much about being in a serious relationship. And I'm certainly not an expert in ministry, ha! However, from what I do know and understand of both I think I would like for the two M's to mesh. I would like for them to be intertwined and mingled in together, becoming and growing harder to separate and distinguish as time goes on. I would like to know the slower steadiness of learning grace through a marriage to a godly man who loves and serves the lost; and me, his helpmate serving right alongside of him - encouraging, assisting, serving, loving and eventually/hopefully/maybe rearing children in the ways of the Lord to follow after their father...

Currently, I believe these are sweet dreams and hopes to lay at the feet of Jesus who holds all things together.

Any and all thoughts on this will be greatly appreciated as well as a joy to read and discuss! =)

The Cold

Forgive me of my failures to blog consistently. And...forgive me for using this reunion post to do nothing short of complain, whine, vent my general frustrations with: the common cold, which for me eventually morphs into an awesome sinus infection.

I can put a tally up for having at least two of these sarcastically wonderful experiences within less than 3 months...wwwhy? =(

One week this one has lasted. Monday I was laid flat out; in bed til 12pm and catching a 40min nap, oh, around 5pm. Tuesday...again could barely get up in the AM however, I managed to push my self out of bed and make it to work, only a mere two hours late...

Wednesday and Thursday follow Monday and Tuesday as an alternating, up & down coaster ride of feeling great then feeling not-so-great.

Today, Friday, I'm feeling spent. My voice - well, you cold liken it to a 60 year old smoker's rasp. As I attempt to speak to others at the office, occasional words seem to just fall away making my sentences more like a game of fill-in-the-blank rather than a contribution to conversation....sigh, I do not enjoy this...I've waved my little white flag to this larynx seizing cold by just tapping out of verbal interaction....praying the phone does not ring during the lunch break of phone girl #1, in which case I become phone girl #1.

Why not go see Mr. Doctor you ask? My answer, plain and simple, stubbornness. Besides I wouldn't have anything to blog about today, on the this doing-nothing-day in the office, right? Ah, sigh, there is some redemption to being in this cross fire of internal germ warfare. I'll suffer through to contentment today, with each application of chapstick to the nostrils, and secret tissue nose plugs stopping the 'drainage'.

Reigning Blessing from Above

"Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change." - James 1:17

News update:

My roommate is engaged! Ali Douglas will soon be Mrs. Andrew Hawkins =) So sweet.

I went to my first engagement party last night and it was great. So many folks came to celebrate and what a celebration it was as they recounted the proposal story.

And, this morning at around 4:50AM little Sophie Magdalene Lightcap was born - solid 8lbs 14oz. She is my new neighbor and soon to be friend!

Can't wait to meet her.

Just another Manic Monday

My apologies for a blogging delay of about hmm...7 months!

I'm pregnant!

Just kidding...terrible joke.

Although several of my close friends, and even family, are currently with child. I am not. I am single. Annd, do not endorse premarital activities that might have the potential of any kind baby making...nor do I practice them...ehmm, just to clear the air =)

Great news, with no intention of patronizing or insincerity despite the lengthy gap in updates, but Matt Hill was found - safe and sound! Found in Asheville, NC not long after being reported missing. Great news. And great illustration of relentless love and pursuit by God for His people. He will leave the 99 to seek the 1.

Although, reasons are unknown to me as to why he went missing, all is well now. That is all I need to know.

How about a quick update on my life perhaps?

Indeed 'tis a Manic Monday for me. Christmas is in two weeks and I've bought 3 presents - all of which where for my friends - and my mom's family Christmas is this weekend! double eek!

However, I shall not fret, because 1) I am crafty, creative, and resourceful in a pinch 2) I am also thrifty and frugal in a pinch and 3) God is good and does provide for all things.

So, when as the Christmas gift crunch is beginning to squish me I am fighting for Joy, letting, and more often than not making my quaking, feeble heart rest in Truth. The heart of Christmas!

Missing: Matt Hill

What's up folks:

So, if you have been watching the news in Charlotte and DC or following probably anyone with Campus Outreach on Twitter or are friends with anyone from NC, SC or DC on Facebook then you have probably heard about the search for Matt Hill. Matt Hill is on staff with Campus Outreach in Washington D.C. This is the first year for this branch of CO - ministering and evangelizing on the campuses in the DC area. What an adventure is must be to be apart of the launch team of an organization that is all about people hearing, knowing, and living the gospel - especially in such an influential city, our nation's capital.

On Tuesday morning Matt Hill went missing... Missing: Matt Hill The word about him being missing is getting out and from Twitter it seems that progress is being made as far as finding/getting very needed information.

What's the connection to me and you?

I know his brother. His brother is on staff with CO Greenville. And if you are believer, Matt is your brother in Christ - how sweet that is, that we could be tied together by Christ!

My heart has been burdened for him and by this whole situation since I first heard of it. Please pray. The FBI is saying this is a critical missing person case. Pray for the Lord to be the strength of his family and friends at this time. Pray that God would have mercy to let us know where he is/may be - that he may be found! Pray for God's glory to be shining through this difficult time, revealing His character as sovereign and keeper of all things especially his people. Pray that we would see this in light of eternity...suffer through with a heavenly perspective - such a strong, scary, powerful thing that can't be done without God's grace. Pray that if he should not be found, that we would remember the words of Jesus, when he says that no one who is his will ever be plucked from his hand and rejoice in this Eternal Hope when gloomy doubts and despair come knocking on our heart's door.

Crafty Creation

It is TUESDAY! and yes, I'm still alive. I've almost flatlined in the blogging world. My apologies as my life has be super crazy the past few weeks.

Nevertheless, here is my most recent creation, made for a special little girl on her 4th birthday.

Ta-dah! A magnetic chalk board. She, as well as her siblings, loved it too - blessed my heart. =) haha

The following are pictures of the progression of it's creation:

Original Item: old bulletin board.

Base Layer: Magnetic primer.

Top Layer: Chalkboard spray paint

Personalization

Decorative Practicals: Cute Magnets!

And there ya' go. Easy and so much fun for kids!!

* Just be careful with younger toddlers and chalk....some of them like to eat the chalk instead of drawing with it!

A thought for you, on Thursday

Am I really sticking to my schedule?? after my vent about not being on one...hmm...=)

So twice this week I have been asked what I like to do for fun. Is it bad I'm almost stumped by that question?? Potentially. I do have fun, not like in college kind of fun: hanging out till late with friends just killing time "destressing" from all pressure of school work etc.; but still have fun!

Why do I feel somewhat insecure about that question too? Probably because 1) I'm almost stumped by it, and we all know that well adjusted happy people do stuff for fun! and 2) I fear some type of judgment.

Anyway...Here are my thoughts on what is fun:

Hanging out in good company eating good food, telling lots of jokes, sharing lots of laughter, and stories
Going to Andrews, North Carolina
All staff river day with Snowbird Wilderness Outfitters
Being outside
Being silly with kids
Going out for a night on the town
Trying new things
New experiences
Playing around on my guitar
Writing/Reading and Discussion
Yard Sale-ing
Giving gifts
Catching up with folks on life
Listening to new music!

There ya go....just a few things that are fun to me, and for me...
I've been reading another book lately. This one is called Sabbath . It's been good to read and I think maybe I was stumped on the question regarding fun because I don't really rest anymore, because there is a type of rest/rejuvination in doing things that are fun, because they mostly cause you to experience joy which is rejuvinating.  Here is a short quote to follow up on that thought:

"Much of modern life, of course, is specifically designed to seduce our attention away from this inner place of refuge. When we are in the world with eyes wide open, the seductions are insatiable. Hundreds of channels of cable and satellite television; telephones with multiple lines and call-waiting, so we can talk to more than one person at a time; fax machines; mail, e-mail, and overnight mail; billboards; magazines; newspapers; radio. Every stimulus competes for our attention: Buy me. Watch me. Try me. Drink me. It is as if we have inadvertently stumbled into some horrific wonderland.

 Sabbath time can become our refuge. During the Sabbath we set aside a sanctuary in time, disconnect form the frenzy of consumption and accomplishment, and consecrate our day as an offering for healing all beings."

All this is of course done in Christ: 

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."